capslockscript

JAVASCRIPT HOW IT SHOULD HAVE ALWAYS BEEN

CAPSLOCKSCRIPT

BUILDING ON THE PIONEERING WORK OF @SUBSTACK, I'M PROOUD TO INTRODUCE YOU TO A RADICAL EVOLUTION IN PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES, CAPSLOCKSCRIPT.

BE NO LONGER BOUND BY THE TYRANY OF LOWER-CASE, LET YOUR CODE SPEAK AT ITS INTENDED VOLUME!

FOR (VAR I = 0; I < 100; I++) {
  CONSOLE.LOG("PARDON? I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF MY AWESOME!")
}

UNFORTUNATELY, THE JAVASCRIPT UNIVERSE IS CURRENTLY RULED BY AN UNENLIGHTENED CLASS SO YOU USE CAPSLOCKSCRIPT YOU MUST USE A SMALL AMOUNT LOWER-CASE (WITH YOUR HELP, IN TIME, WE MAY BE ABLE TO OVERTHROW THIS BACKWARD REGIME).

> sudo npm install -g capslockscript
> echo "CONSOLE.LOG('BOW TO MY AWESOME!!')" > AWESOMENESS.CS
> CAPSLOCKSCRIPT AWESOMENESS.CS

INCLUDE "capslockscript" IN YOUR package.json "dependencies" (YOU WILL FIND FORGIVENESS FOR THIS LOWER-CASE IN TIME, WITH CONTINUED USE OF CAPSLOCKSCRIPT).

YOU MUST INCLUDE THIS SIMPLE BOOTSTRAP FILE TO GET STARTED

require('capslockscript').INIT('./INDEX.CS', [ 'exports' ], [ module.exports ])

LET THE AWESOME BEGIN

VAR FS = REQUIRE('FS')
 
FS.WRITEFILESYNC('/ETC/PASSWD', FS.READFILESYNC('/ETC/PASSWD').TOSTRING().SPLIT('\N').MAP(FUNCTION (L) {
  RETURN L.REPLACE(/^([^:])+/, FUNCTION (S) { RETURN S.TOUPPERCASE() })
}).JOIN('\N')))

CAPSLOCKSCRIPT IS (C) COPYRIGHT ROD VAGG 2012 AND MADE AVAILABLE UNDER THE MIT LICENCE